You Can Say Yes If You Do It Right

As a sort of backhanded tribute to Robin Williams, who tragically committed suicide this past August and who struggled with alcoholism, I thought I would write a brief post in which I share some of the things I've learned about having a healthy relationship with alcohol.

Having a healthy relationship with alcohol is not rocket science. Just follow two simple rules:
(1) Always pay for it yourself.
(2) Always put an emphasis on quality over quantity.

Show me someone who follows these rules and I'll show you someone who can be trusted with alcohol. Show me someone who won't follow these rules and I'll show you someone who really shouldn't be drinking in the first place.

Let me flesh out these rules a bit more. Don't wait around for others to ply you with alcohol. (This is a very easy trap for college students to fall into, speaking from personal experience.) Don't let others make your alcohol choices for you. Go to a store, pick out a good product that you genuinely enjoy, take it home, and drink it responsibly.

There's a lot to be said for drinking at home vis-à-vis drinking in a bar.
(a) It's way cheaper. I don't know what the average bar price for a bottle of Heineken is these days, but whatever it is, I don't want to pay it.
(b) You're not hostage to a bar's alcohol selection.
(c) There won't be any waiting in line to go to the bathroom.
(d) If you end up overindulging, you don't need to worry about getting home, because you are at home. Relatedly, you don't need to worry about being a nuisance in public, because you're not in public.

You don't have to drink alone: by all means, invite one or two friends over, supplement your drinks with some music and food, and have a good time. (I myself like to drink by myself. I think of those lyrics in Billy Joel's "Piano Man": Yes they're sharing a drink they call loneliness, but it's better than drinking alone. What a crock. When drinking in bars I have never felt any sort of camaraderie with the other people around me.)

Here are some more suggestions to chew on:

• Don't drink every night: get your drinking down to one or (at most) two nights a week.

• Don't have more than two drinks in one sitting, especially if you're drinking on an empty stomach. After having those two drinks, have something to eat.

• Beer drinkers, don't drink your beer from the bottle: go get a proper solid-glass pint glass (not some cheap plastic glass) to drink it from. Here's a Photo Booth photo of my venerable "New Orleans Bourbon Street" pint glass that I bought from the NOLA Walgreens at the corner of St. Charles and Felicity for $4 back in 2002:



The quality over quantity thing

As I am a beer drinker, let me conclude this entry with some specific beer recommendations.

Lager: Don't settle for a mass-produced American light lager. Get an import like Pilsner Urquell or St. Pauli Girl; alternatively, seek out Full Sail's Session Lager if you're a "buy American" sort of person. FYI: My lager of choice is Nicaragua's Toña.

Pale ale: Reach for Anchor Steam Beer or, if you can find it, Samuel Smith's Old Brewery Pale Ale.

Stout: I highly recommend Samuel Adams' Cream Stout, which is every bit as good as (if not better than) Guinness.

Bitter: If you've never had bitter before, Sierra Nevada's Torpedo will bring you up to speed.

A final word:
Don't be afraid to experiment. Trying a variety of beers (or wines or whatever) will give you a better understanding of what you like and what to avoid.